Look at me, mom. I’m on TV… again. Okay, so it’s TV via the web. And I’m not the main focus of the segment; that honor goes to Ellen Reeves, author of “Can I Wear My Nose Ring to the Interview? A Crash Course in Finding, Landing and Keeping Your First Real Job.” But that is me (the devastatingly handsome, not-looking-a-day-over-27, Skyped-in guy on the left). And that is Katie Couric. Maybe you’ve heard of her, or recognize the face. I didn’t, until someone over at CBS contacted the Jobless and Less press department, prompting the VP, Communications to task a Research Assistant with exploring Ms. Couric’s alleged celebrity. She checked out. So I accepted their request to participate in a piece entitled…

Jobless in America

Luckily for them, I’m both jobless and in America. Strange coincidence, wouldn’t you say? I’d like to rectify the “jobless” part (I rather enjoy the “in America” part). Maybe some plight exposure would help. It certainly couldn’t hurt. Or could it? That was one of my questions… does having an unemployment blog, which sets me up as an expert in being unemployed, create a negative impression among potential employers? I’ve been unemployed quite awhile now, freelance assignments notwithstanding. There is the ever-so-slight possibility that I’m doing something wrong. Take a moment to digest the realization that I’m fallible. I’ll wait.

Ms. Reeves informs me that my blog is, in fact, a good thing. Employers will see it as showing initiative and a willingness to learn new skills. They’ll also recognize my attempts to stay active and help other people. The success I’ve had attracting visitors and press will probably help too. Now if only someone would hire me, or knight me. That would be cool. But I’d prefer a job. Or a million dollars, I’d take that… just sayin’.

The Katie Couric segment has already led to one positive development. Ms. Reeves is going to help me reinvent myself, hopefully change me from an unemployment expert/online marketing guru into a job-having expert/online marketing guru. This may involve some or all of the following…

• Hair and wardrobe changes
• Resume revamping
• Fantasy job description (Maybe I’ll finally get to be a warlock with a cloak of invisibility.)
• Elevator pitch improvement

This is actually a good opportunity, and despite my usual irreverence, I will take it seriously. Stay tuned, fair readers, for more in the continuing saga that is my unemployment. And enjoy the video segment. Ms. Reeves and the Wall Street Journal guy both know what they’re talking about. May they teach you something, or, at least, confirm what you already know.

I’ve been a horrible person. It’s not because I hate you, though I probably do, because I’m a horrible person. How’s that for circular logic? It’s because I’ve been ignoring my blog – the public manifestation of my unemployment. Don’t get me wrong, I love blogging, and have no plans to stop. (And I love you too.) Life just got very busy, in a very good way.

My short-term unemployment status is now in question. I don’t have a full-time job with an annual salary, health insurance and a 401K that will never let me retire. But I do have a desk smaller than a standardized test cubicle from elementary school to sit at every weekday, all day. I do get email reminders to delete files off the server and remove food from the office refrigerator. And I do have an ever-growing to-do list. But the most exciting part… the multiple paychecks in my future. Now if I could only remember how to turn them into those green pieces of paper.

A contact I’d recently reconnected with emailed me a few weeks ago. She was heading up a big project and asked me to participate. I couldn’t say yes fast enough. It didn’t matter what the work was, though given the source, I had a sense. Nor did it matter that sitting next to me would be “some New Jersey yokel who mainlines Diet Pepsi and eats cashews by the barrel,” as she described him. Okay, maybe my crystal ball told me that last part. It’s been a whirlwind two weeks. Who can remember what came from the all-knowing, all-seeing orb and what came from my soon-to-be temporary boss? But shortly after she contacted me, I was working. The orb portended good things.

That’s the upside, or the downside when it comes to my blog. In addition to a temporary full-time gig, I have smaller freelance projects, which keep me from sleeping much. And there’s the potential for more.

One small project came by way of wifey. A freelance client of hers found me through her portfolio website, and asked for help with his new website. He needed some editing and troubleshooting, and, essentially, a kick in the ass to get things done. It sounded interesting, by which I mean, it paid money and sounded interesting. And if there’s one thing I can do, it’s kick some ass.

An old dear friend reached out to me about some small-scale project management work. I have the skill in my repertoire, though the discussion was purely theoretical. I referenced a social media map I’d seen at a WordPress conference, and that became a short-term project. The discussion has since evolved and should lead to more work. She wasn’t just feeling sorry for me, as I first suspected.

There’s also been some extra blogging on the side. That’s right, not only have I ignored Jobless and Less, I’ve cheated on it with other blogs. It’s all out in the open now. And I’m not ashamed. One blog called SmartBlog on Social Media is about cooking or keeping a pet pachyderm. Or maybe it’s about cooking your pet pachyderm. The focus of the site was a little unclear when I started. So I wrote a piece on social media, as it relates to search engine marketing…

Let social media help your SEO

The other site is AOL; maybe you’ve heard of it. I hadn’t. Here’s a link to my first article there…

Seeking Stay-At-Home Dad… Positions Being Filled Now!

The second piece for both sites is written and could go live at any moment. I’ll post the links when they do. So my advice to you – hated and loved reader – is to stay on my site and hit [refresh] until they appear. That could be in an hour or a week. But the surprise of knowing will make the waiting worthwhile.

The point of all this isn’t to gloat, far from it. Nor is it to garner sympathy. I’ve averaged five hours of sleep per night for a couple weeks. And April may find me unemployed (or underemployed) once again. The point is to raise some important questions.

Can I really cobble together a living from all this? I don’t know. Do I want to? Again, I don’t know. Many people make a living freelancing, some a very good living. But freelancing seems like one never-ending job search, interspersed with lots of work. These are the opportunities presenting themselves. Being in no position to turn down work, I keep accepting. What choice does a long-term unemployed type like me have? I’ll give it a try and let you know what happens.

We welcome you to the land of the shadow people. (courtesy of http://www.brandeis.edu)

Job sites annoy me. It admittedly doesn’t take much, given my current unemployed state. I’ve yet to encounter one that provides the ideal job search experience, if something so oxymoronic even exists. Every job site, from the all-encompassing (Monster, HotJobs), to the industry-specific (American Marketing Association, Media Bistro), to the company-specific (Joe’s Burritos and Plumbing Supplies International, Inc., Fred’s Pornographic Balloon Animals, LLC), has problems. Some are barely speed bumps on the endless road to not getting a job, and some are more like cement dividers piled high and connected to multiple nuclear devices that detonate and wipe out an entire city when breached. In other words, they’re impassable, at least until Jerry Bruckheimer makes a movie about finding work in a jobless post-recession recovery. Given that a job site’s purpose is to display job openings and attract users – essentially market the company to applicants who may become employees or customers – the problems are all inexcusable. Here is but a sampling, presented in my own top-secret order that I will carry with me to the grave, watery or otherwise.

Sites display an alphabetical list of all the countries in the world, from which the applicant chooses his home country. The US is near the bottom, though it likely provides most of the applicants, at least for domestic jobs. Afghanistan is at the top, though it’s citizens likely have more pressing issues, such as staying alive. Really, is it so hard to list the US first? It would save 99.98% of the 10,000 applicants vying for that one assistant coffee getter opening five precious seconds. That’s time that could be spent perfecting the art of tearing open multiple sugar packets at once. This minor oversight shows a lack of forethought and care, which will manifest itself in more significant ways elsewhere.

Sites often require way more detail than necessary. The exact dates I was in school or previously employed, down to the day, can’t possibly matter. That I graduated college on May 5, 1994 won’t be of any use until I’m famous and the subject of a question in Trivial Pursuit: The 21st Century Underachiever Edition. Maybe I can also find out the weather for that Spring day in Lancaster, PA, when my career began, or the addresses of the barns that the Amish raised before working in the fields and churning butter. There’s plenty of useless facts out there. Exact dates don’t add anything to the conversation. (Norm: “Can I have a job?” Company: “No.”) Wouldn’t “May, 1994″ suffice, or even just “1994?”

Sites often require a home phone number as part of my contact info. I have a cell phone, but no home phone, like 20% of the population. It’s easy enough to simply fill in the field with my cell number. That mythological call would get to me either way… no harm, no foul. But stay with me on this one. I apply to many media and marketing companies and departments. They market to users via many channels, including wireless. It seems like they should understand enough about their business to recognize this disconnect and do something about it. After all, the lines of communication between corporate departments are always wide open. More likely with small problems like this is that they just don’t care.

Job sites sometimes don’t work on Firefox, my web browser of choice. The last time I checked, Firefox had a 25% usage share; one quarter of the people online are using it. Is any company so amazingly fantastically stupendously awesome that it can afford to risk missing 25% of the potential applicants for a job? Those missed users may even be a tad more Internet savvy than the average job seeker, given that the Firefox is open source and not standard on new computers. This shortcoming speaks volumes about a company, and none of it’s good.

Job sites often bombard me with useless information, before, during or after my resume submission. One site routinely serves me with a “get your degree online” ad before letting me apply for a job or even see the description. This marketing message might show better results if linked to certain types of jobs. It’s called targeting. They probably teach it at the schools being marketed. Online education is a valuable service, and some people will want more information. But serving this ad repeatedly, to everybody, does more to drive users from the site than it does to endear them to a service. I personally have stopped using the offending site.

More infuriating still are the sites that sell off my information to spammers, who then bombard me with travel deals and Viagra ads. The spam arrives in my otherwise pristine inbox within minutes of uploading a resume. It can’t be a coincidence. Or maybe the site just knows that I always crave a trip to The Bahamas or a four-hour erection ending in blindness and heart attack right after combing the Internet for jobs. Can’t these sites just pretend that they have my best interests in mind, even though they don’t? There are plenty of ways to make a buck without selling my personal information.

And the grand poobah of all job site annoyances… THEY DON’T WORK! Job sites aren’t my only means of attack, but I use them probably more than necessary. And the results are, at best, pretty damn sucky. They’re overrun with garbage, hucksters and, sadly, deserving candidates like me who just want to work. But there’s always the outside chance that my resume, submitted online, will find its way back to me in the form of a job. I’m not counting on it. But at this point in my unemployment, I can’t afford to not try.

What, no free cookies? What kind of establishment are you running here? I may just have to take my business elsewhere.

The Great Recession is over. At least that’s what everyone keeps telling me. The S&P 500 gained 15.2% from April to June for its best quarter since the fourth quarter of 1998. Retail sales rose 2.7% in August. Existing home sales rose 7.2% in July from a year earlier, to a two-year high. Happy days are here again. Uncork the champagne, plate up the caviar and break out the credit cards. The spending party is about to resume? I’ll be at the As Seen On TV store if any employers want to talk to me. There’s a purple snuggie with my name on it, and the Dentist-in-a-Box will save me a little money.

Unfortunately, hiring doesn’t move lockstep with the economy; it historically lags three to six months behind. Some companies wait to see revenues return before bringing on additional staff. Others wait to know exactly what gaps in their depleted workforce need filling the most. National unemployment – currently 9.7% – is forecast to hit 10% by year’s end. There’s one thing I don’t remember from all those economics classes long ago. If consumer spending accounts for the bulk of all spending and consumers are unemployed or scared to spend, how exactly is the economy pulling out of the recession? Anybody care to explain that to me? Uncle Milty… Papa Kruggy… Zeidy Bernanke… anyone?

I’m not even convinced that the job market will be back in any significant way. Worker productivity rose by 6.6% in the second quarter of 2009, the biggest jump since the summer of 2003. Wages remained stagnant, as they have for years. People are doing more work for the same money, and companies are reaping the benefits. Corporate profits are expected to surge; bullish estimates see 12% growth in both 2010 and 2011. That jump in productivity can be viewed as a loss of jobs. Why hire or re-hire someone to perform a task that’s already getting done? Just turn up the heat on the minions. Future innovation may lead to new types of jobs, though no one can say exactly what those jobs will be and to what extent they’ll offset recession job losses.

While things get back to normal (whatever normal will be), I have to deal with the likelihood that my unemployment will continue for some time. There are a few more jobs out there, but companies still receive hundreds of resumes for each position; the ratio of unemployed to openings is 6:1. They interview the best of the best which, given that I haven’t had an interview in a couple months, doesn’t seem to include me. I beg (as well as plead, beseech, entreat and supplicate) to differ, of course. I think I would be an invaluable employee for any company that hired me. So to date, I haven’t been willing to settle for less than I deserve. My previous salary was already on the low end for MBAs with work experience. Compromising seemed unnecessary.

That is about to change. The clock on my unemployment insurance is running down, and the end-of-the-year deadline looms large. This week I began actively seeking jobs that would be a step down. I don’t mean a big, digging in trashcans for recyclables-kind of step. The illegal aliens that roam the Jackson Heights streets with shopping carts collecting cans have that lucrative business locked up. This is a smaller step. I’m now applying for positions beneath my pay grade and skill level, even entry-level if the company is in a strong growth field. I’d be hard-pressed to turn down an offer – any offer – in online marketing, for example. The MBA will likely come off of my resume, at least one version of it. I’ve also started looking for work outside of marketing. Proofreading – one of my fallback skills – is one option. Sales is another, though I’d really prefer it not to be. We’ll see what kind of results I get in the next few weeks. As the time ticks away, I will widen my scope. That’s how desperation works.

[Ben thought he had a new job this time... until he didn't. His latest experience got him wondering just how his fate can depend on someone who has less experience than he does.]

Ben Breier, 23, was a reporter and web producer for the New York Observer’s Politicker.com, a political news network that suffered massive cutbacks last December. Prior to working in New York City, Ben covered climate change and energy-related issues at the federal policy level for Inside Washington Publishers, a trade publication network in Washington, DC. A graduate of Kent State University’s journalism program in 2007, Ben lives in Greenpoint, Brooklyn.

Ben can be reached at ben.breier[at]gmail[dot]com. His resume can be found here.

A few months ago I landed a contract job as a web producer at a cable television station. The position seemed to have the potential to go full-time. But things took a turn for the worse when the company cut my hourly rate in half, to less than I made on unemployment. It was time to resume my search.

I landed an interview for a web producing job in the textbook department at a book publisher. The position looked exciting, and the company reputable. My first interview went swimmingly. There were two web producer openings in two different departments. And the woman who administered the first interview was so excited about my skill-set that she got me in to talk with the other department head. That meeting took place the next day – a Thursday. He had aggressively Googled me, and read my pieces on Jobless and Less. He said that applying for this job would be different than my other experiences. He even promised a quick decision on my hiring. By Friday, I would know the status of the job. The more I interviewed, the better I felt about my chances.

I celebrated my birthday that weekend. My girlfriend had given me a three-day pass to the All Points West Music & Arts Festival. But I spent Friday glued to my cell phone waiting for a response. No answer. Saturday came and went. No answer. Finally, on Sunday night I received an email. He apologized for giving me incorrect information. He went on to inform me that the job decision was in HR’s hands and he couldn’t comment any further. He hoped that I had a good time at the festival (something he discovered by looking at my Twitter feed, which I’ve since locked.)

I had been a nervous wreck all weekend long, and a 9:00 pm email on Sunday didn’t help things. But it gave me a sense of hope. I showed his email to an older co-worker at my job, and she interpreted the subtext as “he wants to hire you, but he can’t because of HR restrictions.” That seemed reasonable. The man went out of his way to apologize to me. He likely would’ve ignored me if I weren’t a viable candidate. One week went by. I heard nothing, save for an email from my human resources contact saying that the search was still ongoing. Another week went by. And then I received the automated email denying me the job. It was almost too predictable.

I typically criticize HR in my posts for what they did wrong and suggest improvements. I’m not a human resources professional, and I don’t claim to be an expert. But I do have some experience as a job search candidate. And that puts me in the position to have an informed opinion. There’s a fatal flaw in the system when the gatekeepers to entry-level professional jobs have roughly the same amount of work experience as the people applying for them. I Googled my HR contact to get her email address and happened upon her Meetup.com page. She is just 25 years old.

The interview process for one position at Company Z went well. The process for the other dragged on for weeks. The mature, experienced 30-something professional got back to me in a timely fashion. The girl who was my age didn’t treat me with the same level of respect. I realize that everybody has to start somewhere. But giving those just starting out in HR the incredible power to determine who lands a job seems like a huge misstep. Don’t they need to go through a learning process? When I picture an HR professional, I see a seasoned working professional who is an authority on what makes a great employee. It’s hard to be an authority on much of anything at 25.

[Ben continues to fight the good fight, looking for work wherever he might find it. He fell a little short of the promised land in his last post. This time, well, he's even further away and feeling a little desperate.]

Ben Breier, 23, was a reporter and web producer for the New York Observer’s Politicker.com, a political news network that suffered massive cutbacks last December. Prior to working in New York City, Ben covered climate change and energy-related issues at the federal policy level for Inside Washington Publishers, a trade publication network in Washington, DC. A graduate of Kent State University’s journalism program in 2007, Ben lives in Greenpoint, Brooklyn.

Ben can be reached at ben.breier[at]gmail[dot]com. His resume can be found here.

I caused quite a stir on a popular New York City technology discussion group a little while back. The site describes itself as… “a fun way to connect both socially and professionally with up and comers who have a stake in future of tech and new media in New York City.” They tend to focus on Web 2.0/3.0 and related topics. I’ve been lurking there lately (rather than actively contributing), mostly because I lack the technical knowledge to comment on MySQL, intuitive query builders and other sexy and exciting topics. But I recently weighed in with a couple of questions…

• How does someone make the transition from the media world to Web 2.0 without an expert knowledge of programming languages?
• What kinds of jobs exist in the industry for people with my mixed online and journalism background?

My questions proved polarizing. One group member lashed out, calling me desperate. Another defended my actions, asking what was wrong with desperation in this tough economic climate. The responses were definitely more positive than negative, and I learned a lot by simply posing the questions.

Desperation isn’t a terrible thing, especially when coupled with the desire to work hard and learn new things. But an overwhelming desire to be employed can definitely play tricks on your mind. I recently applied for an administrative assistant job I found through Indeed – the Google of job sites. For the record, Indeed is a key resource in my job hunt. I simply key in my salary range and location, and the site spits out thousands of appropriate job openings. If you’re unemployed, do yourself a huge favor and try it out.

In this instance, Indeed linked me to a shady-looking, spam-infested site with design aesthetics left over from 1999. I forwarded my resume; a job’s a job to me. Ten seconds after clicking the submit button, I got a call from a telemarketing service that wanted to know if I was interested in pursuing higher education.

In this economy, people are looking to take advantage of everybody – and unfortunately, that includes the unemployed. Desperation, or at least the perception of desperation, makes you an easy target. Norm discussed some of his experiences on Jobless and Less a few months back. Unemployed people need to be active in looking for work. But we also need to be vigilant in protecting ourselves. If a job application asks for information more personal than an email address, such as a phone number, think before providing it. Does the company seem reputable? Will your information end up in the hands of spammers? The quality of their site will often reveal the answer.

Desperation is like hot sauce – a little bit can go a long way. But too much will set your pallet on fire, and send you scrambling for the nearest thing to put out the blaze. Sometimes all you’ll find is a crap sandwich.

See that little light in the top right corner, way in the distance? Yeah, that's not my apartment. (courtesy of http://abodenyc.com)

It’s my ten-year New York anniversary. In July of 1999, I moved here on a day a little warmer than today. In honor of the occasion, I’m expecting a gift of tin, as tradition dictates. Aluminum would be okay too, me being the modren man, with parts made in Japan (domo arigato). eHow tells me the gift should be placed “…in a pretty aluminum bucket from a gardening store.” How quaint, I’ll have to set up the foldout white picket fence for its arrival. The gift is more likely to be a bucket than in a bucket, the City is facing a budget shortfall and further job cuts. It probably won’t even be a bucket, but something smaller and more befitting our collective state. This city dweller has no use for gardening stuff. But I could sure use a tin or aluminum can, something to gather spare change on a nearby street corner when my unemployment insurance runs out.

From a career perspective, the relationship between me and New York has been a little stormy. I held four full-time jobs that ended in layoff. I endured many more temp jobs that ended because, well, they were temp jobs. And I’ve been unemployed and engaged in a job search for a large chunk of the last decade. The total would probably amount to years if I felt like actually adding it all up. I don’t. New York is probably dissatisfied with the relationship as well, having paid more in unemployment benefits than it collected in taxes all these years.

I moved here to work in the music industry. Washington, DC – the metro area that encompasses my old suburban MD stomping grounds – didn’t offer many options to that end. And what options it did offer, I exhausted pretty quickly. My first employer out of college was a major industry trade group. This was before the onset of digital downloading, when the organization’s reputation was still largely intact. I was a full-time club DJ for awhile after that. But public venues still allowed smoking in those days, and secondhand smoke soon choked me out of that job. There may have been work at a local record store or concert promoter, but I didn’t bother. I needed to move to move ahead.

Once in New York, my path to the executive suite continued to wind among the cubicles. I found work at a music website, wrote some freelance articles and edited CD packaging at a major label. None of the jobs paid that well, but I sure got a lot of free CDs and concert tickets and some good stories to tell at parties. Nothing impresses people quite like an entertainment industry job, aside from a large pile of money, of course. And maybe a fat gold medallion, worn with a billowy shirt and leather pants.

We all know the story of the music industry these last few years – free downloads, declining CD sales, industry lawsuits. I decided a couple of layoffs ago to be open to other career options. The MBA was supposed to help with that… legitimize me as someone who could work in the “real world.” Many people think the entertainment industry is all glamor, all fun and games. It can (or at least appear to) be for the lucky few. But it isn’t for the peons who make up the other 99.5%, those not photographed climbing out of fancy cars without underwear. They work hard. And the talk show hosts who propagate the lie should be put down. Mary Hart… watch your back! You’re already in the hole, having partnered with John Tesh.

These days I’m a professional in search of a job and an industry – not what I’d envisioned for myself ten years ago. Do I second guess some of my actions over the years? Sure, sometimes. I could’ve sought work at this company or that. I could’ve networked more and kissed more (or different) ass. Do I regret my major career decision – to follow my interest and passion? No. I made an honest go of it. I followed it as far as it would take me. That’s fine. That’s life. And I won’t ever have to wonder what would’ve happened if I’d only tried.

[Ben's job search goes on, as much as he'd like it to end. The last time we heard from our hero, he was enduring new and exciting forms of rejection (nay, torture) at the hands of his HR nemeses. This time he fights back, a little.]

Ben Breier, 23, was a reporter and web producer for the New York Observer’s Politicker.com, a political news network that suffered massive cutbacks last December. Prior to working in New York City, Ben covered climate change and energy-related issues at the federal policy level for Inside Washington Publishers, a trade publication network in Washington, DC. A graduate of Kent State University’s journalism program in 2007, Ben lives in Greenpoint, Brooklyn.

Ben can be reached at ben.breier[at]gmail[dot]com. His resume can be found here.

While waiting to hear back from Company Z, I put out feelers for other jobs, just like everyday. Company A – a lobbying arm for a national body – was hiring a communications coordinator. I applied for the job the day it went up and received this response 2 days later…

Dear Ben:

Every employer looking for a media professional knows that when there is a typographical error in the first line of a letter, the applicant is missing an important skill. Best of luck with your job search.

Dread and sickness immediately filled my gut; I’d sent a prospective employer an email with an unacceptable typo. The HR person – we’ll call her Betty – understandably wrote me off. I responded anyway. It was a no-lose situation to tell her that she was making a bad decision…

Betty,

I’m sorry that you think an accidental use of ‘simple’ as opposed to “simply” is a complete and total indicator of my professional ability. In this case, I would like to express to you that you are wrong – I am a capable professional, and know that I would do an outstanding job in any media related position.

Good luck on your search to fill the position.

She called me three days later to come in and interview for the job. I researched the hell out of Company A in the interim. My girlfriend works in Company A’s industry, which gives me access to a human database of information. I knew what likely to expect. 13 people would be interviewed for the job, and three of them brought back for a second interview. While not as competitive as at Company Q, the circumstances were competitive enough to worry me.

Of all my job interviews so far, this one left me the most optimistic. Betty seemed incredibly receptive to my new ideas for Company A, and believed my media background would serve them well. Following the meeting, I was asked to write a surprise press release on the conference room laptop in 45 minutes. It came out really well. On my way out, Betty commented, “I knew there was a reason why I brought you in.” I smiled.

An email response from Betty, shortly after I’d followed up with another writing sample, gave me more reason to be excited. “Nice job,” she wrote. “We’ll be in touch.”

I celebrated my birthday that Friday with friends at Essex Bar & Grill on the Lower East Side. For the first time in awhile, I felt like I was heading in the right direction – toward a second interview and potentially my ideal job. I truly enjoyed myself in the company of friends – a rarity since I’ve been unemployed.

On Monday night, Betty rejected me.

Ben can be reached at ben.breier[at]gmail[dot]com. His resume can be found here.

Share your job search experiences in the unemployment forums…

I wrote the following post for The Wall Street Journal blog “Laid Off And Looking” a little while back…

Getting Help After Multiple Layoffs

The piece discussed the Obama administration’s policy in Iraq and Afghanistan and the political and social repercussions in a nation fighting many battles at home and abroad. Or maybe it explored ways to avoid a collective “f**k off” from one’s network after repeated requests for job search help. I’m pretty sure it was the latter. But I’m positive the piece went over BIG! A month – and 17 magazine covers, twelve books, five feature-length films, three albums of show tune covers, two Jerry Springer appearances in drag and one line of unemployment-themed dolls carrying my likeness – later, and not much has changed. I’m huge in Sweden (not ABBA or Europe huge, but close), and still unemployed here. The good times continue to roll.

My post did resonate with some, which makes me all warm and fuzzy. (Self-medicating with my own special Crunk Juice – mouthwash and Mountain Dew – helps too.) And just yesterday the Inside Office Online blog – part of the Microsoft Developer Network – revived my teachings. Follow along, my children…

The care and feeding of your (jobs) network

Giving back to one’s network – helping those who help you – is as important now as it was last month. Times are still hard. Inside Office Online has partnered with career site Monster.com to help job seekers find work. The Office Online Career Center‘s “4 steps to find the right job” are…

1. Plan a job search strategy
2. Search for the right jobs
3. Build a great resume
4. Post your resume on Monster.com

I guess my plan could use a little fine-tuning…

1. Apply to every opening possible because working beats eating canned dog food
2. Consider every job that pays money for services rendered – even those that require late hours under the elevated subway – the right job
3. Write “PAY ME TO WORK, I DO STUFF GOOD” in crayon on used cocktail napkins
4. Tape my “resume” to telephone polls and stop signs near tall buildings

I joke because I love. But if finding work were as easy as they suggest, we’d all be happily employed and the recession but a distant memory. It’s not, and we’re not. And, um, it’s not. A productive job search requires a fair bit more subtlety, not to mention skill and luck. Their list is completely obvious, unhelpful and self-serving. But believe it or not the site does provide some valuable resources behind the marketing speak.

Included is a varied collection of resume templates, broken down by profession and career phase. There are more than I can shake a stick it, and I’m one talented stick shaker. The site also offers a job search log template in Excel. I couldn’t download it because my computer is Justin Long and not John Hodgman. But Excel is my preferred method of tracking resume submissions, and it works very well.

There’s also a ton of valuable content. An article on resume keywords jumped out at me; fortunately, I was able to fend it off with my superior linguistic (and stick) skills. Filling one’s resume with the keywords that hiring managers use to describe a position betters one’s chances of being considered for that position. This is sound advice. Another article talks about highlighting transferable skills when changing careers. Many of us are exploring multiple fields in a tough job market, and could use this advice.

Let’s not forget the job listings. Monster has a ton of them, which may or may not be helpful. In theory, all the tools found on the site will help turn one of them into a job. In practice, that may be true in some small way. Who knows? It can’t hurt to look around and fire off a few resumes. At the very least, job listings provide a sense of the job market’s current state. And maybe you’ll stumble upon the perfect position for that special someone in your network… a little gift to show you care.

[Welcome to Ben's second guest post. You may remember this talented yet unemployed media professional from his previous exploits in the job market. This article highlights some of his more recent experiences.]

Ben Breier, 23, was a reporter and web producer for the New York Observer’s Politicker.com, a political news network that suffered massive cutbacks last December. Prior to working in New York City, Ben covered climate change and energy-related issues at the federal policy level for Inside Washington Publishers, a trade publication network in Washington, DC. A graduate of Kent State University’s journalism program in 2007, Ben lives in Greenpoint, Brooklyn.

Ben can be reached at ben.breier[at]gmail[dot]com. His resume can be found here.

My last piece for Jobless and Less (Note to HR… be nice to the unemployed) detailed how two gigantic media companies are handling the hiring process during the recession. Although neither company hired me, Company Z was quick with their rejection, suggesting that I apply for another job, while Company Q dragged out the process for nearly three months, keeping me in the dark and filling me with false hope.

Moving forward, I was excited about my chances with Company Z. The HR department passed me along to a different representative, who was much younger and less experienced than the rep who handled me the first time around. She was incredibly professional in the interview (April 17). I’d hear back about a second interview by Wednesday of the following week.

So I waited in anticipation. The week went by surprisingly quickly. Not hearing anything by the promised date, I reached out to her on Thursday (April 23). She got back to me the following Monday, saying that they needed some more time. Given that Company Z actually asked for references, I just assumed that checking them was causing the delay.

Two weeks later, there was still no word about the job.  I reached out on a Monday (May 4), and the HR rep said I would “…know something within 48 hours.” That meant Wednesday or Thursday. Her precise timetable excited me. But 48 hours grew to 200+ hours. I was haunted with a familiar feeling; this felt like Company Q all over again.

The ultimate smack in the face happened came while poking around for other jobs on Company Z’s parent’s Web site. I noticed a function allowing the user to check the status of a job. The job I applied for at Company Z was closed April 28 (my birthday, coincidentally). That was almost a full week after the human resources representative told me I’d “…know something within 48 hours.” Our conversation on May 4th was just a front. They had already decided to reject me, but were likely holding out on the final “no” until the job was completely filled.

Even if the economy weren’t in shambles and prospective employees weren’t facing one of the toughest American job markets ever, this is a cruel practice. I understand the logic – Company Z wanted to keep all options open in case its lead candidate rejected the job offer. But it’s unreasonable for HR to inform candidates that they are moving forward with someone else. If I were rejected for a job and then the company came back to me later with the same job offer, I’d be ecstatic.

The lesson here? HR quality varies wildly not only from company to company, but from one HR person to another. A positive experience with an organization doesn’t guarantee another the next time around, especially dealing with a considerably less experienced rep.

I’ve yet to receive final word from Company Z.

Ben can be reached at ben.breier[at]gmail[dot]com. His resume can be found here.

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