Free money, but you missed it (ha ha!)

Yesterday morning a guy calling himself Bailout Bill handed out money in Times Square. Amounts ranged from $50 to $5000, probably based on the recipient’s tale of woe or the quality of their performance. I was working out in a gym 17 blocks away, oblivious to what might be the only money changing hands in the city…

Man hands out cash in New York

Self-respecting New Yorkers avoid Times Square whenever possible; it’s packed with traffic and people stopping every 20 feet to point cameras at each other. So most of the cash recipients were likely tourists, at least until word got out. But how bad could their situation be if they could afford to vacation in New York – the most expensive city in the country – a month after the holidays? I’m just sayin’.

Seeing the publicity opportunity that these people saw (the whole thing was a stunt for a website), I decided to apply the idea to Jobless and Less. Naming myself Nevermind Norm, I set up shop this morning in the entrance to the abandoned Yofiore on the corner of Roosevelt Ave. and 82nd St. in Jackson Heights. The religious zealot only berates people there on weekends, so this prime traffic spot was all mine.

My staff of sexy young females corralled visitors with the promise of cash in exchange for their personal stories of layoffs, hospital bills, tuition expenses, etc. But after each story, I hit them with my tagline, “Nevermind!” and summoned the next person in line.

I think the event was a resounding success, for the ten minutes it lasted. Many people learned about Jobless and Less and the spirit in which it operates. I think I converted some skeptics into fans too; site traffic is already spiking. And I escaped without any broken bones. It was a win for everyone.

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3 Comments

  1. 405er wrote:

    really don’t know how i missed this guy. i need it! thanks for the heads up on this! just came upon your site, love the witty banter. perhaps you’ll enjoy our new club for those receiving New York’s $405 Unemployment Benefit per week, New York’s fastest growing club: http://www.the405club.com.

    Wednesday, February 4, 2009 at 11:09 pm | Permalink
  2. Lynne - Ohio wrote:

    I think you have a career in writing, because you are very funny! Enjoyed your blog…

    Thursday, February 5, 2009 at 7:10 am | Permalink
  3. loannightmare101 wrote:

    OH you are so funny! I too am overqualified and unemployed for the 3rd time in 2 years.

    Now, I’m in worker retraining going back to school with people half my age so I can get a Certificate or some piece of paper that will prove I have the skills I have honed through work experieince for over 20 years.

    Sunday, April 5, 2009 at 3:45 pm | Permalink